This week, my coworker lost her Mom. It was not sudden or unexpected but that really didn't change anything. After all, we are never ready to lose our Moms.
When we got the word that her Mom had passed, my heart sank for her. I, like most of us that have laid our Moms to rest, naturally thought back to the day we lost our own Mothers and what its like to live in a world without a Mom.
Love them or hate them, you know most Mothers love their children in a most unique way. For the majority of us it was our Moms that rocked us and cared for us and hugged us and kissed us. They took care of us when we were sick and made sure we had what we needed and sometimes what we wanted. Right or wrong, they did their best for us. No Mom is perfect, they are human. They make mistakes. Lots of them. So do we.
But in our lives, we are given but one Mom at birth. We were paired up by some guiding force and when we were born, the life of our Moms changed. For a time, she lived a selfless life, putting her child first and her own wants and needs secondary. She made mistakes and more mistakes. But she never gave up on her child. She loved her child with uniqueness that is unmatched.
This week made me think about Moms. All the Moms, the new ones and the old ones. I thought about the bond that exists between Moms and their children. How all their hopes and dreams were bundled up in a noisy, messy and very demanding package. Yet, when it came to their babies, there was nothing more beautiful, more inspiring or more heaven sent in this entire world.
The journey a Mom travels is long and exhausting. It is also filled with indescribable love. There a moments of joy that make all the sleepless nights fade into some distant obscure memory that leaves barely a trace as the years go by.
Love them or hate them for all their faults, they are our Moms. And when they die, a huge part of us dies with them. That part is our childhood and the anchor which grounded us to this world. We are left to pick up the pieces of a life that seems foreign in many respects. If we are lucky to have aged gracefully before letting go of our Mom's hand for the last time, then the road our Mom's traveled seems clear and understandable. If we are lucky enough, we can forgive them for their mistakes and embrace the best part of what they gave us.
Without a doubt, Moms shape and mold us into who we are today. We remember what they taught us and their mistakes taught us how to avoid pitfalls in our own lives.
The world has one less Mom this week and that is a sadness we can all share.
Showing posts with label mom. Show all posts
Showing posts with label mom. Show all posts
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Of Mothers and Sons
I heard it said once that the relationship between Mothers and Sons is a unique one. I was watching Oprah interviewing Danzel Washington as he spoke of the relationship between his wife and his son. He talked about how close they were and he put it like this, he said "a boy's mother is his true first love and for a mother, her son is her last." I always remembered that and when I had my son, I found truer words could not be spoken. There is something amazingly special about the love of a son. I am so fortunate to have experienced it.
My son was born weighing in at a whopping 9 pounds. That was 12 yrs ago and I have all but forgotten most of that delivery. I've watched him grow from that baby to a Kindergartner who's backpack was almost as big as he was. I watched him walk down the halls of his elementary school on the last day of school before moving on to a new campus and fifth grade. I've watched him fly through tennis shoes and as of yesterday, my baby boy is wearing a size 10.5 shoe. I've watched him go from that little boy that I used to have to pick up to kiss to the little man that is pretty much looking me in the eye. My son is growing. His body endures the agony of growing pains while his mind is learning the world isn't always peaceful and fair.
My son is the designated grave digger of all pets and animals we find in need of a final resting place. He does so with great care and compassion. He loves science and art and is generally fascinated with this world of ours. He is caring and loving despite the fact that he must live in a house full of women. I suppose that will only help him deal with women as he becomes an adult. He's seen us at our best and at our worst.
Yesterday, my son and I went to the grocery store to do the weekly shopping. I noticed how much he did for me, pushing the basket, reaching things off the upper shelves, going back to get things I had forgotten. As we moved through the store, he saw a member of the national guard in uniform at the end of the aisle.
He said "mom, look there's a soldier". I said yes and that he was most likely stationed at the base near our town. We watched as the soldier moved out of sight down another aisle.
He looked at me and said, "I'll be right back mom."
With that I watched him head in the direction I had last seen the soldier. He was gone only a minute or two then I saw him emerge from the other aisle. When he was back with me I asked him what he had done.
He said " I went over and found that soldier. I told him thank you for serving and shook his hand". I said "What did he say to you?" He said " He told me not a problem".
After that, my son asked me if that soldier would be fighting in other countries. I told him I wasn't sure but there was a good chance, yes. He then asked me if he could die.
I looked at him and said "That young man is serving his country because he has made the choice to do so. He takes that responsibility knowing he may have to die for his country. Yes, the chances are good he may die. I would encourage you to pray for him each and every day."
I looked at the tears well up in my son's eyes. Never have I been more proud of my son as I was on that day. He was showing me and himself that he was becoming a man. He allowed his compassion to take him up to a stranger and say something they might need to hear.
I've always hated the idea that my baby would grow up. I feared what the world would throw at his tender soul. As he has grown, I've come to realize and remember that we were all some one's baby at one time. We all endured heartaches and pain. It is part of life. My son will be no different and to spare him those experiences is to deny him the opportunity to learn and grow.
So, like yesterday in the store, I need to let go of the baby and now just marvel at the man and all he will do with his life. Its not easy because he is my last true love.
My son was born weighing in at a whopping 9 pounds. That was 12 yrs ago and I have all but forgotten most of that delivery. I've watched him grow from that baby to a Kindergartner who's backpack was almost as big as he was. I watched him walk down the halls of his elementary school on the last day of school before moving on to a new campus and fifth grade. I've watched him fly through tennis shoes and as of yesterday, my baby boy is wearing a size 10.5 shoe. I've watched him go from that little boy that I used to have to pick up to kiss to the little man that is pretty much looking me in the eye. My son is growing. His body endures the agony of growing pains while his mind is learning the world isn't always peaceful and fair.
My son is the designated grave digger of all pets and animals we find in need of a final resting place. He does so with great care and compassion. He loves science and art and is generally fascinated with this world of ours. He is caring and loving despite the fact that he must live in a house full of women. I suppose that will only help him deal with women as he becomes an adult. He's seen us at our best and at our worst.
Yesterday, my son and I went to the grocery store to do the weekly shopping. I noticed how much he did for me, pushing the basket, reaching things off the upper shelves, going back to get things I had forgotten. As we moved through the store, he saw a member of the national guard in uniform at the end of the aisle.
He said "mom, look there's a soldier". I said yes and that he was most likely stationed at the base near our town. We watched as the soldier moved out of sight down another aisle.
He looked at me and said, "I'll be right back mom."
With that I watched him head in the direction I had last seen the soldier. He was gone only a minute or two then I saw him emerge from the other aisle. When he was back with me I asked him what he had done.
He said " I went over and found that soldier. I told him thank you for serving and shook his hand". I said "What did he say to you?" He said " He told me not a problem".
After that, my son asked me if that soldier would be fighting in other countries. I told him I wasn't sure but there was a good chance, yes. He then asked me if he could die.
I looked at him and said "That young man is serving his country because he has made the choice to do so. He takes that responsibility knowing he may have to die for his country. Yes, the chances are good he may die. I would encourage you to pray for him each and every day."
I looked at the tears well up in my son's eyes. Never have I been more proud of my son as I was on that day. He was showing me and himself that he was becoming a man. He allowed his compassion to take him up to a stranger and say something they might need to hear.
I've always hated the idea that my baby would grow up. I feared what the world would throw at his tender soul. As he has grown, I've come to realize and remember that we were all some one's baby at one time. We all endured heartaches and pain. It is part of life. My son will be no different and to spare him those experiences is to deny him the opportunity to learn and grow.
So, like yesterday in the store, I need to let go of the baby and now just marvel at the man and all he will do with his life. Its not easy because he is my last true love.
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